What readers want more than anything – is advice. Each week, I receive a number of questions. Most of the time I provide these answers specifically to the inquirer, but it appears much more helpful to put these answers here, so you can benefit from them too.
Today we answer the first question for The Advice Column.
“After an emotional attack, I tried to rebuild my life. I focused on exercise and other life experiences. Although it helped me a lot, I have found I am still upset. So upset, in fact, I’ve continued crying during the past 2 months. I trusted a cousin with my struggle, telling her in confidence about my situation and she shared it with the whole family. How can I trust anyone now? I feel I am only safe alone. Please advise.”
“Thank you for sharing your struggle with me. I send you peace and love and I hope you can feel it surround you. You maybe depressed, but the major reason is that your heart is broken. To complicate matters, you have been betrayed by your cousin too. I am proud of you for exercising and staying busy. I’m glad this has helped. I do have some advice for you.
My advice: Take a few days of solitude. Write everything that happened. The emotional attack, the struggle, the difficulty. Write out every painful part of it. Be sure to cry and allow yourself to be a total mess. Then, once you have mourned the experience, light your writing on fire. Please do so safely! As the paper burns, let go of the sadness and trauma. Let go of the stories that have held your heart prisoner. When the flames go out, get a new sheet of paper. Write a new story. Write what your new life looks like now that you are no longer held hostage by the past? Write how you wake up and feeling joyful and hopeful. What kinds of experiences will you have now?
Most important, love yourself through this entire process. You are a beautiful spirit. Your life is full of meaning and purpose. It is the hard times that solidify these truths in our lives.”
What else would you suggest for the inquirer of this question?